My period started this morning. Ah well, we’ll just have to keep trying. To be honest, I’m a little relieved. Not that I don’t want to have a baby, I do. It’s just that trying, or constructing a baby as Anna put it, is so much fun. We old married couples tend to do it on the bed all the time, I’d almost forgotten the joys of the stand up fuck, when the strain on the legs and the back sort of adds to the pleasure.
Any time, any place, anywhere…..I’m sure someone must have said or written that.
Oh, I forgot to tell you – I’m being head-hunted. Sounds like a tribe of savages from Borneo are after my cranium. Shame it didn’t happen six months or a year ago, before motherhood became an issue. I don’t think he’d be very happy if I put it off for another year, and another, and another. Anna was right, the clock is ticking…
“I’ll make breakfast, shall I,” he said, smirking.
Anna held out a paper bag. “Here’s my contribution, fresh croissants. I hope you’re grateful. I had to drive miles out of my way to get them.”
“That was very good of you,” I said, mimicking her sarcasm.
She waited till the kitchen door had swung shut before she spoke. “So I did interrupt something.”
I pulled my gown a little tighter around me. “You might have,” I conceded. “You are early. If you’d arrived when we agreed we’d probably have finished.”
“So that’s why he smells so strongly of pussy?”
“Yes, I got a whiff when he kissed me.”
“I’ll get dressed, and we can go outside and sit in the garden,” I said, trying to change the subject before her train of though brought her round to the right conclusion.
We were sitting on the sofas in the Chinese pagoda that we’d had built near one wall of our south facing garden. The sky was blue and the sun was glinting through the trees.
“I hope he isn’t pissed at me for interrupting his early morning love-making?” she said.
“Don’t worry, I promised to make it up to him later.”
She giggled and I knew what she was thinking before she opened her mouth. “I don’t mind waiting, if you two want to go back upstairs and finish off. I know how grumpy men get when they’re cock blocked. Anyway, it’s not healthy for him to be walking around all day with a half used erection.”
“What time are you picking up the girls?” I asked, changing the subject again.
“Not till noon, Cathy has ballet first thing. She’s so cute in her little pink frilly dress. When are you two love birds going to stop fuck for fun and start making babies? The clock is ticking, you know.”
“We are trying,” I said impulsively.
“Yes…. or we were, before you came banging on the door.”
“Well, it’s about bloody time. I was staring to think you wanted to stay happy and carefree forever.”
“Are you saying that children don’t bring happiness?”
“No-o-o….I’m not saying that. The little darlings take and they give. They rob you of sleep – at least initially; and they make your breasts swell – so they can suck nourishment from your flesh; they make your tummy flabby and leave stretch marks behind when they abandon their home inside your belly; your hair goes lank, your teeth are under stress and-“
“You’re really selling it to me. I’m surprised women still have babies if that’s what we have to look forward to.”
She laughed. “That’s just the downside. The upside is that they are your own very special creation – little bundles of pure love, all wrapped up in a smile and a giggle – which can sometimes mean they’ve just shit in their nappies. You’ll just love the smell of baby-poo, there’s really nothing quite like it for stinking up the place.”
“Lovely…… I can hardly wait.”
“But once you hold your child in your arms, you wonder how you ever existed without her, especially the day when she looks up at you and utters the immortal word…. mummy. Then you forget everything else and just melt into a big puddle of pure pride and joy on the floor. How long have you been trying?”
“About two weeks.”
“Ah yes, I remember those days, when you don’t so much make love as construct a baby. Fun though. I didn’t wear knickers for three months – they just got in the way of a quickie over the sink or on the sofa. I take it he’s entirely on board with your desire for motherhood.”
“Oh, he can’t wait. He’s been on at me for a couple of years. In the end I promised that we’d start trying when I reached thirty three.”
“And your birthday was two weeks ago. I forgot…..sorry, darling. It’s just been so strange recently with the divorce looming and the custody battle, and him being such a bastard. Did I tell you he had a new woman?”
“The girls told me all about her. Some red head with big tits; he always did have a thing for big breasts, I don’t know why he married me, mine are something less than a mouthful. She’s been sleeping over apparently – practically moved in.”
“It sounds as though you still care for him.”
“Oh no, I don’t really give a shit about him any more. I just don’t want some bimbo coming in and expecting my girls to start calling her mummy. Anyway, enough of the depressing talk; you know you’ll have to give up work and stay home to breast feed once the baby comes, don’t you? How are you going to cope with being a stay at home wife?”
“I’m sure I’ll manage.”
“Of course you’ll miss the second salary. But he’s got to be bringing in at least a hundred a year, if not more, so you aren’t going to be exactly on the breadline.”
“It’s only for six months, after that I’ll be going back to work.”
“You’re getting a nanny then?”
“We’ve discussed the possibility.”
“What’s the betting once you’ve had the baby, any idea of leaving him with another woman will fly out of the window?”
“I’ve also considered working from home, at least until he’s at school.”
“He…? It’s going to be a boy is it?”
“I mean he or she; it doesn’t matter, as long as it’s healthy and ours.”
“It might not matter to you babe, but I’m betting he’s secretly wishing for a son, to carry on the family name.”
“I don’t think he minds either way.”
“I thought that, until I’d had the second girl and wanted to stop there. Then it all came out. He told me he wanted an heir, or preferably two. I could have gone on shelling girls into my sixties before a boy came along. There have been hardly any boys in my family for three generations.”